Don't care what other people say, I know you fool around all day. now it doesn't hurt me anyway, I am alright.
And when the day turns into night I'm in the club forgetting you and I. And when I forget about how you treated me, you proved me right!
Now that I've tickled your ears with a little bit of Medina, Lets get down to business.
Some random weird guy was pestering me for a date and I said yes. He flaked out on me last night. Which was fine and good, because a) I didn't feel like going to meet new people tonight, and b) he never really was that interesting. Internet dates are prob. never a good idea, and I don't much care if they EVER happen. Thanks.
Thought I would track what I've eaten today. Too many carbs, not enough protein. normal amount of fat. Not enough calories. I'm really close on the calories so I'll guess that I was just off on what I ate today. Hey, if Tyra can lose 30 lbs by keeping track of what she's eating, It can't do any harm for me to try keeping track again, can it?
Gotta find foods high in protein and low in carbs. and then eat the fuck out of them.
I wouldn't say that I feel hopeless lately, because I don't. I think discouraged because I'm too tired to go to the gym and I'm being really hard on myself. However, I did do a little bit of yoga this morning before work which felt great. I'm too tired at the end of the day to go to the gym. Rather, I'm too tired to FORCE myself to go. AND My knee is starting to hurt again, which means I have to go do leg exercises. bad genes + superheight = predisposition for joint hell. I want a personal trainer.
Work is stressing me out. Please do more work, while we're not going to pay you any more, but please do more. faster. and don't forget to smiiiile! my only hope is that I come out of this position with more skills than I went in with.
meh. I had 100 other things to "blog" about but... the only one I can think of is that, things will happen when they're meant to. When the time is right, things will fall into place. I'll get the urge to move my ass and do something when I'm supposed to, and shit will happen.
I really envy people who have always known what they want to do. They're the lucky ones who succeed in life because they have a goal to reach and they've just always known what it was. Two year olds that know they want to be a doctor, or an 8 year old who can play the piano as well as any classically trained adult pianist. They've got their shit laid out for them. How does that happen? Is that a product of an active upbringing and involved parents? Destiny? Fate? Chance? maybe there are answers hidden in what we already do every day and don't think about? perhaps my daily activities all come together to form one awesome super power that I have. Helping people somehow?
I really, really hope in my trying new things that something CLICKS and lights a fire in my soul and I fall in love. keep trying.
keep trying.
I've never stopped believing deep down in my soul, I've never given up. I don't ever want to know what that feels like. I hope I never do.
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